Addiction, defined?
I think there are really two addictions with cigarettes, and not everyone becomes addicted to both at an equal rate.
The most obvious is the addiction to nicotine. I have only recently become slightly addicted to the actual drug. It's not a very powerful addiction, even after 10 years. But I'm good like that, being able to live outside of my body's physical needs for the most part.
The second, and the one that really has me, is the addiction to smoking. All of the little ticks and tocks that come along with it. Lighting the lighter just the way I do. Having a fresh pack. Unwrapping the pack. Wrinkling up the cellophane and tin foil. Pulling out that first Camel. Smelling it. Sometimes they smell like chocolate, sometimes like raisins, sometimes like dark chocolate covered raisins. Holding the cigarette. Spinning it in my fingers. Lighting it. Using matches. Wrapping my lips around it, sucking in. I suck the smoke straight back my lungs, no time to let it simmer in my mouth. That feeling...and then exhale. The time it takes me to smoke, the stopping everything and just concentrating on that action. Waiting for the bus. Driving home from work. Sitting on my front stoop.
That is my problem. I need a new tick.
The most obvious is the addiction to nicotine. I have only recently become slightly addicted to the actual drug. It's not a very powerful addiction, even after 10 years. But I'm good like that, being able to live outside of my body's physical needs for the most part.
The second, and the one that really has me, is the addiction to smoking. All of the little ticks and tocks that come along with it. Lighting the lighter just the way I do. Having a fresh pack. Unwrapping the pack. Wrinkling up the cellophane and tin foil. Pulling out that first Camel. Smelling it. Sometimes they smell like chocolate, sometimes like raisins, sometimes like dark chocolate covered raisins. Holding the cigarette. Spinning it in my fingers. Lighting it. Using matches. Wrapping my lips around it, sucking in. I suck the smoke straight back my lungs, no time to let it simmer in my mouth. That feeling...and then exhale. The time it takes me to smoke, the stopping everything and just concentrating on that action. Waiting for the bus. Driving home from work. Sitting on my front stoop.
That is my problem. I need a new tick.
posted by ClickNathan at 9:26 AM
6 Comments:
It's right in front of you.
U
Mmm I'm loving you right now, whoever you are.
very well put, nathan
hey, here's a request for a new page. now, just wait one sec...i just had it...i know it's around here somewhere...oh! there it's not! haha, i always get people on that one. now let me see...oh ok, i found it:
you should start a dear nathan blog, like a dear abbey thing, where anyone and everyone could write you, maybe gmail you, and you could choose the questions and answer them in a fun, cool, intellectual and/or helful way. i think it would be fun.
now, where'd i put that comment i was thinking of a minute ago...
YES! That would be the funnest blog on the planet!!!
haha i thought so. i can't believe i thought to mention it.
Post a Comment